So I just found about

So I just found about this :

Officials Probe Crash That Killed Aaliyah

A friend AIMed me the news, well actually he alluded to the incident. Me, having no idea what he was talking about was totally shocked. At first i thought he was fucking with me because he knows how much i adore her and the new album. Then the URL proof was legit.

Shit. Really bad. At dinner, I told my aunt here and she said, “Toi, tu as mal au coeur?” Which sounds just about right.

Me, I’m bad in the heart.

A few minutes after digesting the news, the track, “Are You that Somebody” came on in my playlist. And it’s such an upbeat and humourous song. And in fact her whole second album is so good cause it’s got so much humour. I’m listening it to it now; and now, it’s just so sad. And it’s equally bad because the album isn’t sad at all. But me, i’m really sad about it. This is the first time that an artist i am actively into has died. There are those who died well before i knew of them. And then there are those that have died after i was really into them, or at least past the time that their present work was rocking my world, so to speak. And then there’s the fact that she was 22. 22 is Tragic.

I listened to her first album here in paris about 5 years ago. I was particularly thrilled that i loved the new one here because i had this one really clear memory of walking down Rue Rivoli with “One in a Million” in my discman and i caught myself in a mirror (there are all these thin strips of mirror between the storefronts) full on dancing to “Hot Like Fire”. I felt kind of embarassed but i was mostly laughing to myself. And it was a damn hot july day to boot. I remembered this when i packed the CD in nyc. I remembered this when i heard about about the new one. I remembered this when i caught myself dancing at the bus stop listening to “Rock Da Boat” last week. I remebered it when the article sunk in. I wonder if i could dance to it with the same kind of abandon again. Hmm.. Not for awhile, i imagine. I even remember writing, “i’m one in a million you fuck” to some boy who broke my heart that same summer.

I figure it’s hit me so hard mostly because she’s been shooting into my ears for a large portion of my solo explorations of this alien city. And making me feel a little less lonely, and definitely a lot more funky. I’ll miss it. And i’ll miss all the albums she won’t get to make, the movies she won’t be able to be in, the hot guys she’ll won’t be able to date, all the gossip stories we won’t be able to trade… Silly things pop stars mean to me, i guess. But it was more really, there were all those songs on the metro, at the flea market. The time that guy followed me home on the bus, it was Aaliyah i was listening to when he interuptted me. I told him her name and he even wrote it down. I’ve given her mp3 to at least 10 poeple, a few even being frenchies that hadn’t heard of her. Just through the album, she’s been one of my few friends here. I’ll miss her.

Notes:

Aaliyah

One in a Million

Songs, prayer lift memory of Aaliyah [Detriot Free Press]

Artists Mourn Aaliyah [Rolling Stone]

The Aaliyah Remembrance Book

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